The other day I was sitting in an eye doctor's office for 4 hours. 4 fucking hours, I was in the waiting area. I went there to have my eyes checked because one of my pupils wouldn't dilate. Long story short, it was related to a sinus issue which is now better.
But I was pissed off sitting there in that waiting area, and I was hungry and just felt like shit. But then I overheard an old man telling a story, and I was hooked instantly.
The guy was 94 years old, drove himself to the doctor, and spoke of World War II. He looked no older than 75, was sharp, well-spoken, and well-dressed. He was a pilot for a number of years, and he was shot down over Germany as he piloted a bomber. As that plane was going down, everyone except for him grabbed a parachute and jumped. He chose not to jump because his tail gunner had been shot and he wasn't sure if he was dead or not. So he crashed the plane in a field.
From that point he had about 50 guys with guns on him, and was taken hostage, and remained a POW for over a year. His posture was perfect as he sat in that chair. He sat completely upright and told his story to another guy who was 93 years old. The funny thing was the 93 year old was saying to him, “Wait until you're my age. I'm 93.” And this guy says, “So what, I'm 94.”
I'm listening to this tough old bastard tell this story and all I can think was how I wished so badly I could take some of these men and bring them back to youth in this day and time. This was a guy who would go to hell and back with you, this was a guy who didn't look for excuses in life, and this was a guy who took himself very seriously. I know this may sound stupid, but I looked at this old guy like he was larger than life.
My trip to that doctors office was to hear that guy's story, not for my eyes. This is the guy that I want to be like as I get older. And when the other guy asked him, “Were you scared to death when this happened?” That old bastard looked him dead in the eye and said, “Nope. I was too busy doing my job to be scared.” Fucking right on!
If there is one thing I've found as I've grown older, it's the fact that most people truly do not give a shit about you. 80-90% of people who try to be your friend, are trying to be your friend because they want something. They may want your help in the gym, maybe a good deal on a car, a discount at the furniture shop, free drinks at the bar, help getting out of a speeding ticket, you name it and they want a hookup!
Fuck people like this. I have no room in my life for people who have these intentions. I have no room in my life for people who argue with me. There is no reason to even entertain people who have conflict with me. I usually just cut the conversation short and let it be. In a few weeks what's it going to matter anyways?
The problem most people have is they expend all of their energy and thoughts on negativity, leaving no energy for growing and building (and I'm not speaking physically here). What is the meaning of life? For most people I assume the meaning of life is to make money, buy things, and indulge themselves in countless distractions. The meaning of life to me is finding peace and serenity within myself. It's about those moments when you just don't give a fuck and become free of anything that can drag you down.
Don't waste your time with negative people
Sometimes when people argue with me, I look back at them and I stare right through them. I visualize them as stationary chess pieces that just need to be moved so I can keep moving forward. The quickest way to move them is to drop them, and I don't mean with a fist (although sometimes I wish we could!). Just end the conversation. Don't look at it like you're backing down from them. Don't waste your time entertaining their bullshit.
When getting into the gym is a new experience for you, it's harder to zero in on the muscles being worked. You're grunting and struggling and it's very uncomfortable. Eventually you become more adapted to it, and occasionally you will lose your thoughts and become one with the movement. Your body is under a heavy load and it's very difficult, but your mind is free. Nothing in the world bothers you for that brief moment.
Now, what if you could do that throughout your entire day? What if you trained your mind to block out all of the nonsense and walked in a pure state of meditation? It CAN be done, but it takes practice. It's harder to drop bullshit than to entertain it, because your emotions get involved and expressing your emotions is natural.
Most of my arguments are work related and it's because someone is being insubordinate and not doing their job. It gets to a point where I just tell them like it is. They don't like it, end of story. There is no reason to become a people-pleaser at this point. There really is no reason to become a people-pleaser at all.
Statistically speaking, 60% of people you meet are not going to like you, and if you bodybuild I'd say it goes to 80%. So just remember that as you're walking around during your day, and keep in mind that about 60-80% of motherfuckers aren't even worth your breath.
So what does this leave for me? Well, it means I spend a lot of time alone. I'm the guy in a crowded room who looks lonely, and I'm okay with that. It's not social anxiety to me at all. It's really just not wasting my time and energy on people who mean nothing.
Something else to consider here, what are most peoples conversations anyways? Most people want to talk about God awful current events like mass shootings, they love telling people how they got fucked over, or they want to talk about what their plans are hoping to get reassurance from strangers. I just don't see the point in this when I can be more at peace with myself in my own mind. I have a wife and 2 kids at my house who rarely talk about negative things. As much as I'd like to tell you guys I have it made, in truth I have plenty of issues in my own life that need to be fixed, but we don't harp on them.
Take this one guy I know for example, the first thing this asshole asks me every time he sees me is if I've moved yet. I don't live in a great area, and he lives in a new subdivision. The guy makes less money than I do, but his wife makes more than him. So I feel like this guy solely looks at me like someone to compare himself to. I'm his buildup and sense of accomplishment for living in his nice neighborhood.
The next question he asks is “Is your wife working yet?” My wife works part time and doesn't make a lot of money, but she is home a lot to watch my son and stepdaughter and take them to school. Every fucking time I run into this guy, those are the first things he asks me.
So why would I waste my time even talking to this guy? Why do I need to live up to his standards? He is just an example, but people like this are everywhere. THEY DO NOT WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND, THEY ARE COMPARING THEMSELVES TO YOU SO THEY FEEL ACCOMPLISHED IN LIFE…PERIOD! Get people like this out of your life.
When you avoid distractions and negative influences, the path to success seems so much easier and straighter! All of a sudden your goals don't seem so difficult and you can think more clearly. You'll probably even sleep better! The world as I see it today, is a world of insecure people with constant distractions, just drifting through life. I want friends with the mentality of the old man at the eye doctor's office. Until I run into more people with that frame of mind, I'm perfectly fine being by myself unless I'm with my family.
Take a step back and think about who is in your life. Is there anyone in your life who just exists? Is there anyone who brings you down or constantly makes material references to you, or maybe even compares everything they have with you? Or someone who taunts you about bodybuilding, and likes to tell you what a waste of time it is?
Drop those fuckers! You're better than people like that.